We make decisions out of love, or out of fear. At the core of it, that’s what all our decisions are. Love or fear.
Four little words.
I was afraid. And so was everyone else I know. And yes, I was seriously considering skipping it.
And then… Anton.
I haven’t been able to find the interview, but I remember reading an interview very early on when he talked about how he was going to “become a Trekkie.” He was young – 17 I think – when he was cast. He was going to binge all of TOS and make himself a fan, for us, because we needed the new cast and crew to have an understanding of what they were getting into.
The first time Leonard Nimoy met Zach Quinto, that was basically the first thing he said: “You have no idea what you’re getting yourself into.” At 17, Anton had the wisdom to embrace it – and by extension, us.
I couldn’t fix what happened. I can’t save Anton. There’s no way to make his death have meaning – it was a stupid, meaningless, wasteful death – if we let it be. So I went to the movie, armed with the hope I read in a few paid reviews. I don’t put a lot of stock in those – Into Darkness was nominated for an Oscar after all. (For visual effects. Which by the way… OMG, gorgeous.)
I went for love of Anton, and Trek, in spite of my fear.
Last night I was given a great gift. I saw the eightieth Star Trek episode.
Last night, our Spock died – for the last time, and Zach picked up the mantle alone.
Last night, I saw a toast to “absent friends”, and while the camera stayed still, I saw it zoom in on Anton.
Last night, the original crew of the Enterprise, just for a second, was on the screen together again.
Last night, the character of Chekov made what very well could be his final appearance.
Last night, we finally saw the fourth year of the five year mission.
Last night, a wrong was righted.
Last night, a Star Trek movie where no Star Trek movie has gone before and used every kind of possible Trek story in one go.
Last night, the crew of the Enterprise came together as one.