Captain’s log, Stardate 51367.2. We’ve spent the last three days on the Mari homeworld. It’s been a while since we’ve had the opportunity to make new friends, and the crew seems to be making the most of our stay.
That’s one way of putting it.
Why are we starting here?
If you take all the episodes and write them on a calendar, excluding the year they were broadcast, then make your list from that, you get a list that allows you to a) never ever watch the first 3 seasons of Enterprise back to back and b) preserves something resembling the original cliffhangers.
It just so happened that this is where I was when I started the blog.
Why am I writing this blog in the first place?
A few reasons. First – my grandmother really wanted me to. But mostly because yesterday, this happened:
I’d like to say I’m devastated, but I’m not right now. Maybe I never will be. What I know is this:
I kept going. I loved it. I even watched the episodes that Chekov wasn’t in. The ones that he was in I found interesting, like when they go to a bar in “The Troubles With Tribbles” and they have a drink, I liked that. And that one with Apollo and the hand [“Who Mourns for Adonais”], I thought that was hilarious. I really got into the show.
-Anton Yelchin, May 8, 2009. Trekmovie.com interview with Anthony Pascale
I never wanted to leave my fandom behind. I’m just so tired. Chris Pine thinks we can’t do cerebral. Leonard Nimoy is dead. William Shatner is Shatnering. The trailers look like The Fast and the Furious.
We’re all tired.
Anton remade himself for us when he was 17 years old. Let that sink in. At 17, Anton Yelchin decided to “become a Trekkie” because he wanted to do right by us. He’s gone now, and we have to be better for him. So I’m back to blogging. And you should be too. Blog, or make fanart, or fanfic, or whatever but above all, people, and I mean this, be nice to each other. This isn’t fun anymore if you keep the sniping up and I get it, guys, I really really do. I read Phil Farrand too, and I saw what disregarding the fans did for Enterprise but we really really really need to let it go now.
This episode coming up now is fortuitous in its way. We’ll get to why later.
Do it for Anton. Just do it. Go back to your watching habit, your books. Your fiction. Your nonfiction. Read the news stories. Watch them in other stuff. I promise, if you go back to your fandom, there are people waiting to love you even if you don’t love it the same way. I promise.
So let’s talk about Random Thoughts.
Neelix has a girlfriend. Tom has a girlfriend too but of course we knew that. It’s a big deal for Neelix though because it’s the first time he’s dated since Kes.
And that’ll be the last time we hear about Kes until “Fury”.
Anyway, a couple of lines to establish that our aliens du jour are telepaths and we get to the meat of the thing.
Someone bumps into B’Elanna. That’s all – a bump. Since that’s on TV, we’ll assume it’s important later. She and Janeway are in the middle of buying something that is probably not consequential, because that’s clearly the Captain’s job, right?
Meanwhile, Neelix is flirting, and you’d think, from the rest of the teaser, that that’s what the episode would be about, but instead we’re learning about his nauseating desires revolving around whisker-tugging for no good reason.
Tuvok is getting a briefing on how their society deals with crime. They have no crime in their society. You would think that a good time to have this conversation would be before you beam down to the planet, because clearly nothing could go wrong if you find out about the laws ahead of time. Also, Tuvok is a workaholic, as we learned from the last 3 seasons.
B’Elanna is trying to get Neelix back to the ship (why?) when someone starts calling for help, so naturally they run toward the sound of that. Apparently people have gotten past the point where they tell you to yell “fire” if you’re being attacked because cries of “help” get ignored somewhere in the last 300 years.
One of the aliens is beating up another one. This not two seconds after Tuvok got the “we don’t have crime” lecture, which any self-respecting Trekkie can tell you results in bad dialog. Of course, that was Season 1 of TNG, this is Season 4 of Voyager, it’s possible we’ve learned a thing or two since –
“Why? Why were you beating that man?”
Thanks, Janeway. Knew I could count on you.
“I don’t know,” he responds, like every Trekkie ever knew he would.